Now I look back and see that everything that has happened has been a blesing and a necessary lesson so I could become a more joyful and helpful woman. What happened in my past is done now. I don't need to be ashamed because God is in all things and my past actions are lessons learned. Today, I have the 12 Steps as my solutions, and now I can do things differently. By accepting the existence of my God, fully and completely, I hope to have peace of mind. That's what I truly desire.



Read more... 

I am faithful when I am living fully in the present moment, and doing the right thing even when it's difficult and my addictions and compulsivities are crying out to be satisfied, at the expense of others' wellbeing and of my sanity.



Read more... 

Extreme I can handle. I'm a true alcoholic, extreme is all I have ever known. But I also know from watching others in the program that have what I want, it is possible to find balance and harmony. I want serenity more than anything else! More than money, more than a boyfriend, more than a new surfboard and long hair.



Read more... 

Divine beings, whose "mistakes" I believe God must laugh at, because I feel like He knows there really isn't anything ever wrong, because all is well, and everything is going to turn out all right anyway.




Read more... 

I can choose to be cheerful, I can choose to be hopeful, and I can choose to be kind. I can choose to turn to God when I am scared or angry or excited. I can choose to remember I am a mermaid; I can turn my thoughts to the thick silence of swimming underwater.



Read more... 

I want joy, and I want to be of service to others. But where is the line drawn? When am I just torturing myself and pushing myself too hard? But when am I merely giving up when it would be better to persevere? I want to believe that God Is Everything, In Everyone, but why is there so much pain and angst? Can't He give me a break?



Read more... 

I am not protecting myself by manipulating, I am only causing more hurt. My Higher Power is in charge and I can trust Him!


Read more... 

I remember in my last days of drinking especially, I had no power over my addictions. Food, alcohol, drugs sex... saying "no" rarely crossed my mind, and if it did I knew I couldn't deny my compulsions.


Read more... 

I have been avoiding writing the list for a couple of days, because all I could think about was all the reasons why I am not worthy. I finally mustered my courage and sat down with three pieces of paper and a pen. This is what came out...


Read more...