At Least Don't Hurt Them
"Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them." Dalai Lama XIV
The official definition of a miracle is 'an extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause.'
I think that I have experienced a true miracle in myself. Some of the time, I think of others' well-being before mine. Not in a contrived way either, like first I think of myself and then I hurriedly whip my thoughts around into what I think I should be thinking.
For example, I am often annoyed by one of my roomate's behaviors. I mean, she is really the squeaking wheel in my day! I've been tormented "by" her for months now, and finally I had a breaking point. Through some reading of Easwaran and realizations that were gifts from my God, I learned some lessons that bring me peace on a daily basis.
First is that I can experience joy and fulfillment only if I am supporting others to find joy and fulfillment. That may seem cliche, but it was a huge discovery for me. I don't always like others' behavior, but being mean, snappy, judgmental and critical won't help them and it won't help me either! I might feel better for a moment after a harsh, witty comment, but ultimately I have improved nothing about myself or anyone else. What I want most is to be at peace. I want to be content; I want to laugh and love easy. I thought that the only way to be happy was if everyone did what I thought they should. I see now that the only way I can have peace is if I am supporting others in their quest for the same.
So when I am tempted to judge, criticize, blame or fight, I ask myself: "Is what I am about to say more beautiful than silence?" I'm so grateful to have been shown this lesson! I don't do it perfectly but I change and grow a little more each day. It's a huge relief, actually, to finally understand that controlling and manipulating others does not and will not ever make me happy; not to mention it's stressful and difficult.
How wonderful it is to know that all I have to do is offer up a smile, a kind greeting, a comforting touch, or even just silence instead of violence, and I will see peace in another, and thus have peace in myself. It feels like mystery solved! The true answer to happiness.
The official definition of a miracle is 'an extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause.'
I think that I have experienced a true miracle in myself. Some of the time, I think of others' well-being before mine. Not in a contrived way either, like first I think of myself and then I hurriedly whip my thoughts around into what I think I should be thinking.
For example, I am often annoyed by one of my roomate's behaviors. I mean, she is really the squeaking wheel in my day! I've been tormented "by" her for months now, and finally I had a breaking point. Through some reading of Easwaran and realizations that were gifts from my God, I learned some lessons that bring me peace on a daily basis.
First is that I can experience joy and fulfillment only if I am supporting others to find joy and fulfillment. That may seem cliche, but it was a huge discovery for me. I don't always like others' behavior, but being mean, snappy, judgmental and critical won't help them and it won't help me either! I might feel better for a moment after a harsh, witty comment, but ultimately I have improved nothing about myself or anyone else. What I want most is to be at peace. I want to be content; I want to laugh and love easy. I thought that the only way to be happy was if everyone did what I thought they should. I see now that the only way I can have peace is if I am supporting others in their quest for the same.
So when I am tempted to judge, criticize, blame or fight, I ask myself: "Is what I am about to say more beautiful than silence?" I'm so grateful to have been shown this lesson! I don't do it perfectly but I change and grow a little more each day. It's a huge relief, actually, to finally understand that controlling and manipulating others does not and will not ever make me happy; not to mention it's stressful and difficult.
How wonderful it is to know that all I have to do is offer up a smile, a kind greeting, a comforting touch, or even just silence instead of violence, and I will see peace in another, and thus have peace in myself. It feels like mystery solved! The true answer to happiness.
